My parent just got scammed. What do I do now?

Start here: the next 30 minutes

Speed matters more than anything else right now. A bank can sometimes stop a payment that has not gone through yet. Do these three things before you sit down for the longer talk.

1. Make sure the scammer is gone

   If they are still on the phone, in a chat, or connected to the computer, hang up or close it. If a computer was being controlled, unplug the internet.

2. Call the bank or card company together

   Use the number on the back of the card or in the bank's app. Say: "I want to report fraud." Ask them to stop or reverse any payment and to watch the account.

3. Write down what you know

   What was paid, how, when, and to whom. Phone numbers, emails, receipts, gift card numbers. You will need this for every report.

How to talk to your mom or dad without shame

Your parent probably feels embarrassed, scared, or angry at themselves. Some will play it down or say it never happened. That is normal. Scammers are professionals, and they target older adults on purpose.

Your goal in this first talk is not to find out who is to blame. It is to get them to keep talking to you, now and the next time something feels off.

• Lead with relief, not alarm. "I'm so glad you told me" goes a long way.
• Blame the criminal. Say "they tricked you," not "you fell for it."
• Normalize it. Doctors, lawyers, and bankers get scammed too. People over 60 reported $7.7 billion in losses to the FBI in 2025.
• Ask, don't lecture. "Can you walk me through what happened?" works better than "Why would you do that?"
• Offer to do the calls together. Many parents feel better on speaker with you next to them than handing the whole thing over.
• Don't take control unless you must. Taking away their phone or checkbook can make them hide things. Agree on next steps with them.

Stay C.A.L.M.: the four steps, adapted for helping a parent

OwlGuardian uses one simple framework for every scam. Here is how to work through it with your mom or dad. The step-by-step scam help tool walks you through it based on what happened, and you can print the C.A.L.M. checklist to keep by their phone.

1. C: Cut contact

   Block the scammer's number, email, and social profile. Expect them to call back, often pretending to be police, a bank, or a "recovery" service. Agree with your parent that they will hang up on anyone who brings up the scam or the money.

2. A: Alert the bank

   Call every bank and card the scammer could touch. Ask for fraud notes on the account, new card numbers, and a new online banking password. Ask if the bank can add you or another person as a trusted contact. Options vary by bank.

3. L: Lock down accounts

   Change passwords on email and banking from a device the scammer never touched. Turn on two-step verification. If a Social Security number was shared, freeze credit at Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion. It is free.

4. M: Make reports

   Report to ReportFraud.ftc.gov, and to ic3.gov if money was lost online. Call the National Elder Fraud Hotline at 1-833-372-8311 if your parent is 60 or older. See where to report, in order.

When to call the National Elder Fraud Hotline

The National Elder Fraud Hotline is run by the Justice Department for fraud against people 60 and over. A case manager helps you report the crime and connects you with other help. You can call on your parent's behalf.

• Phone: 1-833-372-8311 (833-FRAUD-11)
• Hours: Monday to Friday, 10am to 6pm Eastern
• Good for: Any scam with money lost, when you don't know where to start, or when several agencies seem involved.

When to involve Adult Protective Services (APS)

Adult Protective Services is a state program that looks into abuse and financial exploitation of older adults. The name differs by state. Find your local office through NAPSA or the Eldercare Locator at 1-800-677-1116.

• The person taking money is someone your parent knows: a caregiver, neighbor, new friend, or relative.
• Your parent keeps sending money even after being told it's a scam, such as in a romance scam.
• You think memory or judgment problems are making your parent an easy target.
• Your parent lives alone and has no one else checking on their finances.

In the next few weeks

• Check bank and card statements with your parent every week for a month or two.
• Pull free credit reports at AnnualCreditReport.com and look for accounts they didn't open.
• Watch for "recovery" offers. Scammers sell lists of past victims. Anyone who wants a fee to get the money back is a scammer. Read how to spot crypto recovery scams.
• Talk about it again in a few days. Shame often shows up later. Remind your parent they did the right thing by telling you.
• If they need someone outside the family to talk to, the AARP Fraud Watch Helpline at 1-877-908-3360 has trained volunteers.

Help stop the next one

Many people who get scammed once get targeted again. OwlGuardian is an iPhone app that scans your parent's Gmail and quarantines suspicious emails before they see them. You, as their Trusted Contact, get an alert and decide whether to release or keep each one. Your parent can also snap a photo of a letter, text, or pop-up and use Call My Owl for a scam verdict in about five seconds. It does not block calls or texts, and it cannot recover lost money. It costs $4.99 a month after a 30-day free trial.

Questions people ask